


A Series of Lee Jihoon's Romantic Adventures

by sebeunpristin



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M, Unrequited Love, Very fluffy, a bit angsty sometimes im sorry, jihoon being a closeted romantic, jihoon is bae, will update tags as I go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-16
Updated: 2017-04-01
Packaged: 2018-08-22 17:11:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8293547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sebeunpristin/pseuds/sebeunpristin
Summary: Composition major Lee Jihoon is always wearing a frown and has a pretty indimitading aura, but deep, deep down he really wants to find his one true love. But it's a long way to go...(Lee Jihoon and all his love stories. That's it.)





	1. What to do when you’re in love with your engaged best friend

**Author's Note:**

> So... I don`t know about you guys but I basically ship Jihoon with everyone in SVT. And this fic was inspired by that! You`ll see as it goes, each chapter will tell about a part of Lee Jihoon beautiful love life ♥ I hope you guys like it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lee Jihoon's Love Story Part 1: Choi Seungcheol

Jihoon and Seungcheol have been glued to the hip since they had know life as it is. Seungcheol has always been the bubbly neighbour who often created new games for their group of friends and even though Jihoon was younger, never let the smaller boy feel excluded.

As they grew up, they were still together. Where Jihoon went, Seungcheol went as well, and vice-versa. They lived together, shared experiences together and trusted each other like no one else. Seungcheol took him for his first parties, gave him his first alcohol, set up his first dates, listened to his first composition, was the first to know about his decision to study music. The same way, Jihoon took Seungcheol to his first anime events, helped him with his first crush, showed him his first hip hop music, listened to his first raps and was the first to know about his engagement.

Seungcheol was getting married to the sweetest and most extra person in the world, a music major like Jihoon, called Hong Jisoo. Seungcheol and Jisoo have been dating for six years now, since high school, living together (and with Jihoon, since rent was not cheap) for two, and even though they were young, they think is about time for commitment.

This is what Seungcheol tells Jihoon at their apartment’s couch, babbling about how the proposal was very natural, and sweet, and they didn't planned on making a huge wedding but just a simple ceremony that would take place in a month or so, and how Jihoon should definitely be his best man. Damn, he even asked Jihoon to go see a ring with them.

Jihoon, though, was completely dazed. Marriage? He was happy for his best friend but… He loved him. And not in the best friend way.

Around high school, Jihoon's feeling towards Seungcheol started to intensify. But around high school, Seungcheol met Jisoo, and if Jihoon had any chances, they were about 0,0001%.

Now, seven years later in college, they were absolute 0%.

 

***

 

“Jihoon?”

The bleached haired boy blinks. He looks up and sees Jisoo look at him expectantly (and slightly worried) with his curvy cat eyes. Jihoon breaths deeply as he passes a hand through his long blond bangs.

They are at a fancy looking jewelry shop, with golden shiny balconies and smiling attendants who shoves the most expensive rings at their faces. Seungcheol had to do some errands so Jisoo asked if Jihoon could go see their alliance with him. And Jihoon, contrary to popular belief, is too much of a nice guy.

“Sorry. Spaced out.” he says simply.

Jisoo laughed.

“I noticed. Anyways, what d’you think about this one?” he asks, shoving a pretty alliance with a sheet music inscripted inside it.

“It’s lovely” Jihoon answer, and he is being honest “It fits you two.”

“I thought, maybe we could inscript the sheet for Adore U” Jisoo says excitedly. Adore U was a song Jihoon wrote years ago - one of the first ones - and it was the song that helped Seungcheol confess to Jisoo.

“That’ll be cute” Jihoon agrees, feeling sick but smiling softly.

The fact Jihoon had such a big part in their relationship made him feel even worse. Jisoo was also his friend. He cared about him, but the constant feeling that Jihoon was betraying him made him uncomfortable. What would Jisoo do if he found out?

“We’ve be thinking about matching black and white suits too, but isn’t it too simple?” Jisoo looks worried. Every single thing has been worrying him these days, and Jihoon saw his friend as such a fragile, protectable thingy he was concerned the man would break.

“Seungcheol always talked about flowers on his wedding” Jihoon remembers “How about putting some type of small bouquet on you guys’ lapels? Matching colors and stuff.”

“Oh my god, that’s brilliant” Jisoo says in english. “Thanks, Hoon. Dunno what we’d do without you.”

The sickening feeling strikes in with strenght.

Jihoon was happy for them. He really was. They were his best friends, his roommates and his family. He was happy for Seungcheol and Jisoo. He just wasn't happy for Jihoon.

 

***

 

Jihoon haven’t loved anyone before. He did had a girlfriend, which only served him to realize that he actually liked guys; after that, he had a couple of boyfriends that did not last, and a nice share of one night stands. None of these experiences, though, fitted in the descriptions he heard of love.

From what he observed, love was 1) feeling addicted to that someone; 2) feeling happy just with having them around; and 3) feeling amazed by every detail about them. He felt that about three times: with Captain America, with G-Dragon and with Choi Seungcheol.

But now, he was helping Seungcheol send invitations and get a tuxedo and nothing could be more terribly heartbreaking.

What was he going to do? First, he can’t live with them anymore, obviously. Second, how can he ever look at Seungcheol without remembering about how he is in love with him? Third, how can he ever cope with the constant idea put on his mind that he betrayed them in a way?

Everything was a mess, Jihoon concludes, drowning himself deeper into the pile of blankets and plushies on his bed. His earphones play some emo rock song that fits exactly with the weird pains on his chest; the music is interrupted by Justin Bieber’s Sorry, Jihoon’s ringtone, and he picks up without checking who’s calling.

“Hey” Seungcheol calming voice is heard “Are you home? The light on your room is on but you haven’t come out the whole day. What happened?”

JIhoon bites the inside of his cheek. Dammit, why he had to be so sweet? So caring? So lovable? It doesn’t help at all on getting over the raven haired boy.

Jihoon feels a lonely tear shed down his cheek as he hangs out without saying a word.

 

***

 

“Jihoon, what’s the problem with you?” Yejin says with a disappointed expression through Facetime. Jihoon almost drops his phone.

“Me?” he yells, feeling betrayed “Noona, do you think this is my fault?”

Yejin rolls her slightly honey coloured eyes, and puts a nail polish flask in front of the camera. It’s a weird yellow-greenish colour, and Jihoon denies with his head.

“Unless you intent on cosplaying my grandma’s living room curtains.” he says, and Amy looks for another colour to paint her nails.

“Hoonie, you know what I mean.” Yejin sighs “I mean, _oh my god_!" she says, in english "The wedding is tomorrow and you're still moping around and not saying a thing to Cheol.”

“And who says I need to?” Jihoon mutters.

“But wouldn't it be so much better to say it out loud and let it go rather than keep in it and let it devour you?” Yejin argues, and she pauses before laughing silly. “Wow, I spoke prettily, didn't I?”

Jihoon laughs. His best friend was such a dork.

Yejin is a couple years older than Seungcheol; they all lived on the same street growing up and basically have been on each other’s lives since forever. She was already graduated from college and was living on another city, but she still came around from time to time to check on her younger brothers. And, of course, she was coming for Seungcheol’s wedding. The next day. In less than 24 hours, the love of Jihoon’s life was going to be married.

Another flask of nail polish shows up on the screen, taking Jihoon out of his daze. It is a light pink, like cotton candy. Jihoon approves it.

“Look” Yejin continues “All I’m saying is, you better talk to him right now. You might regret it later if you don’t.”

Jihoon makes an annoyed expression, because he know the older is right.

“Fine.” he gives in, and Yejin smiles softly. “But I’m not picking you up at the bus station.”

                                                      

***

 

Jihoon checks himself on the mirror of the bathroom. His hair is nicely tucked in the smallest of ponytails, and his eyes definitely don’t look like he’s been up all night, thanks to Yejin's ability with make up. His best man tie, pretty and purple was strangling him, taking his breath and making him feel completely lost. There's not a trace of tears on his face, even though he did cried his heart out the previous night. Hopefully, his breath also didn't had any hints of the vodka he drank.

He is in a small venue, the cheapest party hall Seungcheol could find. Since it was a small wedding, only family and close friends, there was no need for something big. They would do the ceremony there and the reception there as well. There’s a nice wedding cake at a corner, a simple buffet and flowers at an improvised aisle. Everything was simple, sweet and very Seungcheol-Jisoo.

Seungcheol-Jisoo. That's what they are going to officially be from now on, Jihoon thinks. Said couple was nowhere to be seen, calming down their nerves hiding in their respective rooms for the remaining hour before the ceremony starts.

Jihoon was there extra early, as the best man, and he felt like vomiting all over the vintage dark red carpet. He was avoiding Seungcheol the whole day, because he knows that if they are left alone, Jihoon would feel obliged to say the truth, and he doesn't want to ruin his best friend’s perfect day.

He is still staring at himself in the mirror, wondering if he lost weight like his strangely thin cheeks suggest, when Yejin shows up in the corner of the reflection, disappointed expression clear in her face. She looks like what ghosts in horror movies would look like if they were bossy older sisters.

She fixes Jihoon's collar with a frown.

“When I told to talk to him, I thought I made it clear to do it _before_ the actual ceremony.”

“Of course not. And ruin the whole thing?” Jihoon snorts “I’m waiting at least till a bit of champagne is down their system.”

“You're a mess, Lee Jihoon.”

“Thank you, captain obvious.”

 

***

 

The nasty feeling is still there when Jihoon sits down after it was announced the wedding was about to start. Jisoo’s best man, Jeonghan, sits next to him, holding tightly to his phone which had the camera app on and looking as happy as a child in Christmas. He and Jihoon were close, having hung out a lot with the two lovebirds, always making fun of cheesy couples together.

“Hey” he calls Jihoon. He sounds weird, slow. Jihoon recognizes it as Jeonghan’s drunk voice. Looking at him, he realizes the older is definitely red-faced and with lost eyes as he smiles widely. “You excited?” Jeonghan asks, leaning in closer to Jihoon.

“Sure” Jihoon is, thankfully, great at lying. Jeonghan, though - and drunk Jeonghan specially - is not.

“I’m feeling kind of awkward, you know? ‘Cause, Jisoo’s my best friend and I’m his best man and everything but” he lowers his voice, staring dramatically serious at Jihoon “I used to be in love with him.”

Jihoon's small eyes widen. What?

“Did- Does he know?”

“Kind of, I guess” Jihoon wants to slap Jeonghan across the face for such a vague answer. “I tried to kiss him a couple times, and I’m sure he knows. But that’s long ago, I don't feel that way anymore.”

“Why are you drunk then?”

“Oh, nothing big.” Jeonghan shruggs “I was at a party yesterday, and you know how when you drink more so you won’t get a huge hangover? Yeah.”

“Then-” Jihoon is not sure if he should talk or not. “How did you got over it?”

Jeonghan analyzes Jihoon's face before opening his mouth in a perfect O shape.

“Oh my god!” Jeonghan screams, a bit too loud for Jihoon's liking “Do you like Jisoo too? Or Seungcheol?”

Jihoon slaps his friend’s arm, singning for him to shut up.

“Stop it!” He whispers hurriedly. Jeonghan looks excited as Jihoon sighs deeply. “Seungcheol. But- hey! Let me speak.”

And Jihoon quickly explains how he’s been dealing with this unrequited love for six years and now he just couldn't find the right moment to say it. Damn, he couldn't stop thinking about it, or let go of the sweet feeling (and agonizing angst) Seungcheol made him feel. Jeonghan is a good listener, not interrupting much, but he can't say anything because by the time Jihoon's monologue ends, the door opens abruptly and the wedding march starts to play. Jeonghan only throws Jihoon an apologizing look as he gets up and turn to see the weds-to-be.

Seungcheol and Jisoo walk to the aisle together, arms intertwined. Seungcheol is wearing an all black suit with a black tie and a small bouquet of white and lilac flowers on his lapel; in contrast, Jisoo was entirely in white, except for the black and pink flowers exposed on his chest. They're both smiling, waving slightly at their family. Jisoo’s mom is already crying, and Seungcheol’s brother is making a fighting gesture.

When they pass through their friends, they smile excitedly, and it doesn't even look like they were a wreck just half an hour ago, anxious and concerned about getting married. They look beautiful, and happier than Jihoon has ever seen them.

The ceremony goes through a flash. Jihoon’s own mind is too busy creating scenarios, thinking of possibilities and cursing himself to pay much attention to the cheesy wedding lines. He doesn't even budge when the priest says the “speak now or forever hold your peace” crap - he wasn't going to ruin his bestfriends’ wedding, not even slightly.

He comes back down to Earth by the time Seungcheol is finishing his vows. Yejin is crying behind him, and Jeonghan looks like tearing up too (though he would never admit it). Seungcheol is smiling cutely, and Jisoo looks at him expectantly.

“The point is…” Seugcheol starts to conclude, bringing a hand up to caress Jisoo’s face. “When I saw this tanned kid who didn't spoke korean that well, alone at a corner, playing a guitar bigger than himself…” the audience laughs. Even Jihoon does. He remembers how Seungcheol came to him  after the older`s first day in high school, claiming he thought he saw a divine creature “It was like I just saw an angel. Or just pure, pure light. Jisoo, you're most definitely the sunshine of my life, and I didn't knew how dark it was before meeting you. And I don't ever want to be in the dark again.”

Somehow, there, right there, something clicks in Jihoon’s mind. He wasn't light to Seungcheol, and - he never stopped to think about this before but - Seungcheol wasn't light for him. He had learned to love Seungcheol, he fell for him when he was sweet to him and his heart started skipping after spending all that time together and noticing little details about him. That’s when Jihoon adds a 4th and 5th itens to his ‘descriptions of love list’: feeling like life is not the same without that person; and feeling like that love can`t be reasonably explained.

While Seugcheol and Jisoo seal their marriage through a kiss, and everyone throws flower petals at them, Jihoon thought about how beautiful they look, how right. He hasn’t found someone he fits so well with yet. So when Seungcheol smiles at him, Jihoon’s heart doesn’t skip a beat anymore. He just feels a weight leaving his chest, and finally, and just like that, he’s free.

 

***

 

Two months later, Jihoon is finally settled at his new place. The last box was unboxed, so he figured he could hold a little housewarming party. His roommate, a performing dance major freshman called Lee Chan, asked if he could invite his own friends too. Jihoon wouldn't normally agree, but he supposes he has a soft spot for the younger boy with slanted eyes and short stature, much like Jihoon himself.

By the time Seungcheol, Jisoo and Jeonghan arrive, Chan and his friends are fighting over Call of Duty in the living room.

“Sorry, I didn't found the strength to say no.” It’s all Jihoon says as he brings bottles of soju for them.

One of Chan’s friends, who has too much of a loud voice to Jihoon’s liking, scoffs.

“Hyung, you were just playing with us!”

“Shut up, Seungkwan, he might kill you.” another kid, with western looks, says in a hushed tone.

“I don't doubt that.” Seungcheol says, laughing. Jihoon slaps his best friend’s arm. “You’ve changed, though.”

He is probably referring to Jihoon’s once long blond hair, now cut in a short bowl cut and pink. Light pink like cotton candy, which does not fit Jihoon’s tough image at all. (He wanted to make a big change, since, well, his life did a big change.) But he might be also talking about Jihoon in general. He did changed a lot since he let go of his feelings for Seungcheol.

When Jisoo goes take drinks for them and Jeonghan goes bother the kids and probably make them call him their mom or something, Jihoon decides what to do. He quietly scoots closer to Seungcheol and whispers:

“You know, I used to be in love with you.”

He watches as Seungcheol’s droopy eyes slowly widen, realizing what he meant. The poor thing, probably didn’t even suspected. Jihoon decides to tease him for a bit.

“For six years. Since around the time you started crushing on Jisoo.” Jihoon continues. He knows he is being cruel but, hey, Seungcheol made him suffer a lot, okay?

“Oh my god, Jihoon” Seungcheol says in a small voice. “I didn’t even- Shit, oh my god.”

Jihoon takes pity and smiles slightly.

“It’s okay, now.” he says, taking a deep breath. “A bit before the wedding, I still felt that way, but the moment you two said your vows, it disappeared.”

“Jihoon, if I knew-”

“It wouldn’t change a thing” Jihoon interrups him. “You and Jisoo are made for each other. Perfect matching pieces. I thought you were that for me, but you definitely weren’t.”

Seungcheol watches him ever so sadly with those puppy dog eyes, looking sorry and pitiful. “You’ll find yours, I’m sure of it.” He places a warm hand on Jihoon’s arm, and the younger is so glad he doesn’t feel a thing. An urge to kiss him, an urge to scoot away, a flip on his stomach, a beat on his heart. Nothing. He just smiles, and nods to his best friend’s affirmation.

“We’ll see.” Jihoon agrees, turning to talk to Chan who was screaming for him to get them rid of Jeonghan. This chapter of his love life was concluded.


	2. The sunshiney boy with the bright, beautiful and stupid smile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lee Jihoon's Love Story Part 2: Lee Seokmin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello i'm back  
> today's april 1st but this is not a joke, i actually finished writing this chap yaaay  
> i'm so sorry i'm such a slow writer ;w;  
> i hope you like it! <3

Jihoon’s next romance, as cliché as it sounds, starts at just another normal day at college - the pink-haired boy overslept and ran late.   
  
Trying to organize his backpack while running to his 9am Music History class (why did he even scheduled a morning class?), of course he would bump into someone - said person was a tall guy, brown hair and strong arms that quickly grabbed Jihoon by the shoulders before the boy would fall to the ground.   
  
Jihoon sighs as a few papers fly out of his backpack and he shakes himself off the hold of the man who just saved him and runs to the papers. Then, too late to be considered okay, he realizes he must've been rude.   
  
He turns around embarrassed, and the boy is still there, smiling widely as if he was having fun.   
  
Boy, was that smile gorgeous.    
  
If there was a top of the most beautiful smiles of Jihoon's life, that unknown guy who was currently picking up the papers for Jihoon would be number 1. Damn, he'd take over that list.    
  
Shit, that smile was so fucking annoying. This guy's cute face was making him even more late for Music History.   
  
"Here" the boy finally says something, and his voice is smooth and velvety, comforting somehow.   
  
"Thank you" Jihoon takes the papers and puts them lazily on the backpack, before turning to take a good look at handsome guy.   
  
He looked older than Jihoon (but then again, who didn't?) but there was a very childish aura around him. He wore a simple button up with jeans and sneakers that looked extra good in him. Oh, and he still had that goddamn smile on his pretty face. Shit.   
  
"I'm Lee Seokmin" apparently Lee Seokmin introduces himself. “Majoring in performing arts!”   
  
"Jihoon. Lee Jihoon. Composition major." Jihoon chokes before introducing himself. The boy's bright smile annoyed the crap out of him. But he wasn't going to lie - he wanted to see more of it.

 

* * *

 

 

Jihoon makes it to his first morning class successfully. He has a free period around lunch so he goes look for Chan and his friends,  whom he’s been hanging out with lately, since all of his older friends graduated and were busy doing real adults things. He finds Chan, Seungkwan and Hansol on a bench next to the performing arts department, a building Jihoon avoided as best as he could. It was a place for talent shows, recitals, musicals and etc, and Jihoon has always been way too shy to be a part of those things (and performing arts kids could be really persuasive). Nonetheless, he joined the freshmans, who waved excitedly at him, as usual.

 

They talk trivial things, like Seungkwan’s worry about his weight and the three of them assuring him he was fine. Hansol even said beautiful. Suddenly, a bell rings indicating the end of the period and groups of students come out of the performing arts department. Jihoon is watching the devils walk out of the building when he spots a familiar face - more particularly, a familiar smile. He stares at Lee Seokmin, unfortunately more explicitly than he wanted.

 

“Hyung, you know Dokyeom?” Seungkwan asks, eyes going between Jihoon and Seokmin,  like in a ping pong match.

 

“Who?” Jihoon assumes Dokyeom is Seokmin, of course (he’s not an idiot) but it is easier to play dumb. 

 

“Lee Seokmin.” Seungkwan clarifies. “Tall, stupid and handsome?”

 

“Oh, the one from the year-end musicals?” Chan asks.

 

“The one and only. D’you know him, hyung?”

 

“We just bumped in the corridors once.” Jihoon says, trying to look as indifferent as he could. Seungkwan was a great observer though. And a teaser. 

 

“Oh, I’m close with him.” the younger boy says, looking indifferent as well “I could introduce the two of you, but since you don’t seem interested…”

 

Jihoon curses himself for being this easily manipulated by someone two years younger than him. He wasn’t going to lie, since he let go of that thing for Seungcheol a few months ago, Jihoon was looking for someone to fall in love with again. Lee Seokmin was too bright, but it felt kinda nice, in a fuzzy, confusing and annoying way.

 

“... Okay, maybe his face’s a little cute.”

 

Seungkwan wastes absolutely no time. He waves and screams Seokmin’s name loud as he always is until the perfoming arts major is right in front of them. Jihoon doesn’t really know if he’s glad or utterly pissed off.

 

_What the fuck?_ , he mouths to Seungkwan as Seokmin gets closer to them.

 

“Hey!” Seokmin’s smiling. Of course he is. “What do you want, Kwan-ah?”

 

“No biggie, just haven't talked to you in a while. Have you met Jihoon?”

 

“Oh, it’s rushed cutie!”

 

_ Rushed cutie? _ , Jihoon grimaces at the nickname - not really the best way to be remembered.

 

“Oh, so have you met?” Seungkwan says with a sly smile, and Jihoon just wants to punch him straight in the face. Chan seems to notice though, and grabs the older’s clenched fist in a calming manner.

 

“We bumped on the corridors, I told you Seungkwan” Jihoon cuts Seokmin who had his mouth open.

 

“It was actually kind of weird.” Seokmin speaks up, laughing nervously. “It feels awkward around you, I guess.”

 

Jihoon frowns. Awkward was definitely not the impression he wanted to left. Suddenly, he feels angry. This Seokmin guy was really such an idiot.

 

“I need to go. Bye, you guys” Jihoon gets up, waving at the other and shaking off of Chan’s hold before bowing deeply to Seokmin “Goodbye, Seokmin-ssi.”

 

He walks out, but not before getting a glimpse of Seokmin’s surprised - and ever so slightly hurt - expression.

 

* * *

 

**_Unknown number_ **

_ hey _

_ i’m sry about earlier today _

_ i guess i was stupid? _

_ anyway sry _

_ ohhh _

_ and its seokmin xD _

_ u kno, corridor guy _

_ kwan gave me ur number _

 

Jihoon sighs deeply as he rolls around in his bed. Seungkwan was determined to make that happen, wasn’t he? He saves Seokmin’s contact as “Tall Stupid and Handsome” and fiddles with his phone, wondering if he texts the boy back or not. His inner part who is crazy screaming for a relationship speaks louder. 

 

_ Hi _

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ oh thank god u answered  _

_ are u mad at me? _

 

_ Not really _

_ I guess _

_ It sucks being called awkward u know _

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ actually i thought you were rly cute when we first met _

_ but your boyfriend seemed rly overprotective _

 

_???? _

_ I’m single tho? _

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ but _

_ the guy holding ur hand _

_ the spiked haired one _

 

_ Chan???? _

_ HAHAHAHHA _

_ He’s my roommate _

_ He’s like my little brother _

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ oh _

_ i feel stupid. _

 

_ You are stupid _

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ TT-TT _

_ and you’re mean _

 

_ i’m glad you understand it _

 

Seokmin doesn’t answer for a while, and Jihoon feels anxious. Was he weird again? Did he scared the sunshiney boy away? His worries don’t last long, though, since his phone beeps. Jihoon opens the chat room with Seokmin to be greeted with a picture from the boy making a pouty face at the camera, and the caption  _ “but u won’t be mean to me will u?” _ . Jihoon’s heart skips a beat at the details of the photo - Seokmin’s slightly damp hair, as if he just came out of the shower; his collarbones exposed by the large white t-shirt he wore; the cute moles he had on his face (one on his cheek, one below the right eye…). Everything is adorable and this new feeling consumes Jihoon completely.

 

“Ah, fuck.” 

 

* * *

 

With the time, Jihoon comes to adore not only Seokmin’s perfect visuals but also his exaggerated laugh, smooth singing voice and even the horse puns the boy seemed to be obsessed with. He came to learn Seokmin was always smiling, laughing and doing something stupid, usually with Seungkwan alongside him. He also learned Seokmin liked ladybugs, fried chicken, rock music and hugs. Lots of those. Surprisingly, Jihoon felt okay about skinship with Seokmin. It felt natural when Seokmin back hugged the smaller, when Jihoon sat on the younger’s lap and when Seokmin would pass his long fingers through Jihoon’s light pink hair, stroking it softly and endlessly. It all felt good, and it all felt common.

 

Of course, Jihoon would fight a few hugs and shot a gun to a few heart the younger sent him, just to keep his reputation safe. But everything about being around Seokmin felt so at ease, it was hard for the older to not smile silly at every single joke the younger made, or stare fondly at the singer while he hummed a song.

 

After being in love with someone compromised for so long, maybe Jihoon developed a trauma - sometimes he kept awake all night wondering if Seokmin felt the same way about him. Who knows, maybe he was cursed with suffering from unrequited love for his whole life? But then Seokmin would sent him cute selcas on Snapchat with captions like “ _ missing u _ ” and insist on paying for his food when they went out to eat together. Still, it wasn't a guarantee, and it made Jihoon nervous.

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ have u noticed how eyelashes are supposed to keep things from falling on our eyes but usually its an eyelash that fall on ur eye??? _

_ EYEronic huh? _

 

_ Why are u like this _

 

“Whoa, who is it?” a familiar voice says from Jihoon's door, and Seungcheol gets in, not knocking and jumping straight into his bed, messing everything up. “You had this soft look looking at your phone. I've only seen you like that while watching Big Bang’s concert.”

 

“Shut up.” Jihoon throws a pillow at his best friend “It’s the same look I used to give at  _ your _ texts, I suppose.” he jokes, but he notices Seungcheol is still a bit shook about the whole  _ ‘I used to be in love with you’  _ thing “I don't do that anymore, though. When you text me I just go ‘ _ ugh, this asshole’.  _ Seriously, ask Chan.”

 

Seungcheol laughs quietly. “Anyway, who is it?”

 

Jihoon looks fondly at the phone. The notification on the screen informed that Seokmin sent him another selca, probably a pouty one again. “This guy I met.”

 

“You like him?” Seungcheol raises an eyebrow.

 

“He's pretty fucking annoying.” Jihoon scoffs “But I don't know. It's nice.”

 

“He makes you happy?” Seungcheol asks.

 

“In a slightly ridiculous kind of way.”

 

“Then go for it.” Seungcheol smiles as he puts a hand on Jihoon's shoulder. “I want you to find your Jisoo, okay?”

 

Jihoon only hums. Seokmin sent another message and he unblocks the phone to read it.

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ hey can u go to jamjam rn? _

_ i need to talk to u abt smth _

 

Jihoon gets up immediately, fetching a jacket from the pile of clothes on the bed and running to the door. “I gotta go somewhere.”

 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa” Seungcheol yells. “Is it about the guy?”

 

Jihoon freezes at the doorstep. “Maybe.”

 

Seungcheol laughs softly, like the big brother he is “Like I said, go for it.”

 

The younger smiles, reaching in for confidence. He walks out of the apartment feeling just a few butterflies on his stomach, and they are the nicest ones.

 

_ b there in 15 _

 

* * *

 

JamJam was a nice, kind of retro looking cafeteria just two blocks away from both Jihoon's and Seokmin’s apartments. The place had amazing waffles with nutella that made Seokmin's eyes shine the brightest, so Jihoon, by consequence, also loved the restaurant. Also, Seungkwan worked there, so they often got discounts. Fortunely, it’s not the talkative boy’s shift when Jihoon arrives at the place; the other was about to punch Seungkwan in the face for always cooing and teasing when he and Seokmin went there for kind-of-dates.

 

Seokmin is already there when Jihoon goes through the doors, with an untouched steaming cup of black coffee in front of him. The black coffee was Jihoon usual order (Seokmin hated it since it was way too bitter), but Seokmin hasn't ordered anything? Weird. Specially when there was an overwhelming smell of waffles with nutella in the air. Well, maybe he was just saving the money.

 

“Hey” Jihoon says as he sits down, across Seokmin. The younger smiles - not as wide as usual, though - and pushes the cup of coffee in Jihoon’s direction, who thanks him and sips quietly the drink. Seokmin was definitely weird. “So, what was it you wanted to talk about?”

 

Seokmin gasps and bites his bottom lips nervously ( _ though it looks kind of sexy _ , Jihoon thinks) “I-  uh” Seokmin fiddles with the napkins in front of him “I kinda, well-”

 

Jihoon raises an eyebrow. What was that? Was Seokmin blushing? Was he going to confess or something? Jihoon feels the butterflies on his belly fly around crazily. 

 

“Iwaswonderingifyou'dliketoparticipateonthetalentsshowwithme!” 

 

Jihoon face falls.  Seokmin spoke too quickly for him to understand the words exactly,  but he was sure it wasn't a confession. 

 

“Yeah I mean, would you like to make a duo with me for the talents show?” Seokmin forces a smile.

 

“I don't do talent shows, Seokmin” Jihoon voice is cold now. 

 

“Oh, don't be like that, we can do a Big Bang song or something.” Seokmin nudges Jihoon's hand playfully,  but Jihoon scoots away. “Ah, how about Love Yourself by Justin Bieber? You love that song, right? It’s such a pretty song…”

 

Jihoon is undoubtedly, pissed. Seokmin wouldn't ask him to go there only to talk about a fucking talent show. Maybe he was being cocky, but Jihoon was sure Seokmin felt something about him - and he thought he was going to confess but he was just too chicken to do it.

 

Or what if he actually realized he didn't wanted to be in a relationship with Jihoon? The pink haired boy felt small droplets of tears running up his eyes. He stands up quickly, hiding his face from the younger boy in front of him, who looked shocked.

 

“Go love yourself then, Lee Seokmin.” he says before storming out of the coffee shop.

 

* * *

 

“Seokmin hyung’s here” Chan says while leaving Jihoon's order of thai food on a small clean space of his messy, full of sheet music papers and rests of food, desk.

 

Jihoon flips around in his swivel chair, finally looking away from the music software on the computer for the last five hours. He was working on his music compulsively the whole day, since he left the idiot at the café. And now here the idiot was, probably standing in the living room being the awkward sunshiney thing he is.

 

After Chan is gone, Seokmin knocks softly on the open door.

 

“You’re not talking to me?”

 

Jihoon does not answer.

 

His phone buzzes.

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ i didn't wanted to tell u this through text but _

_ apparently i can't do it irl _

 

That’s it. Seokmin wants to end their friendship or whatever the fuck they were doing. He was saying goodbye and leaving Jihoon.

 

“Seokmin, just leave, okay?”

 

His phone buzzes again and he checks it out of instinct.

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ i like u _

_ as in _

_ b my boyfriend? _

 

Jihoon feels his eyes widening uncontrollably, and he turns around in the swivel chair while clutching his phone tightly. Seokmin is dead serious at the other side of the room, which Jihoon sees as a bit disturbing. Seokmin was almost unrecognizable without his trademark huge smile.

 

“I promise, Jihoon, it’s not a joke, I’m not playing with you” Seokmin carefully takes a step forward. When Jihoon remains in the same spot, the younger goes more upfront. “I like you. I know we’ve only met for a few months and you’re still healing from your last romantic disappointment - yeah, Chan told me about it - but…”

 

“Shut up.” Jihoon interrupts, getting up from his chair and grabbing Seokmin’s nape, kissing him full on. Seokmin feels startled but then relaxes, melting into the kiss, putting a hand in Jihoon’s waist and another caressing his hair. When they break apart, Jihoon smiles - just a little bit, but it’s enough for his cute dimples to show. “Yeah, I’ll be your boyfriend.”

 

* * *

 

Jihoon and Seokmin relationship is based on night over night playing video game or watching movies in Seokmin’s apartment and day after day of the younger just sitting around Jihoon’s bedroom, watching as the owner of the place worked on his music. They also went on dates - movies, park, arcade, shopping, eating out. Everything was kind of new for Jihoon, and he was particularly confused when he and Seokmin reached their 22nd day.

 

Seokmin showed up at his doorstep with a box in hand - a snapback from a brand Jihoon liked. The pink haired boy was utterly happy, but didn’t understood the sudden gift.

 

“Wait, you really don’t…?” Seokmin says, smiling brightly as usual when Jihoon expressed his confusion. “Oh my god, am I your first 22nd?!” 

 

“What.” Jihoon is short of words but full of feeling.

 

“It’s our 22nd day together, Ji!” Seokmin says, smile growing bigger. “As in, two number twos, couples? You’ve never celebrated this kind of stuff?”

 

Jihoon thinks. His longest time “boyfriend” lasted 18 days. Well, he had a girlfriend who lasted exactly 22 and broke up with him because of some non-understandable reasons at the time, saying he was insensitive and disappointing. Jihoon thought it was because she figured he was gay, but apparently… 

 

“I guess I haven’t” Jihoon concludes. Seokmin laughs beautifully and hugs the smaller. It feels nice.

 

“So I’m gonna be your first.” he says while kissing the top of Jihoon’s head.

 

* * *

 

Seokmin rolls around in his boyfriend’s bed. Jihoon is sitting by the desk, with his headphones on, but the younger knows he’s listening.

 

“Don’t you want to show me off?”

 

Jihoon click a few times in the music software before sighing and turning around in the swivel chair. 

 

“Seokmin.”

 

They’ve had this discussion a few times. Apparently, everyone in college knew how close they were, but didn’t realized they were boyfriends. They talked to their friends about it, and Seungkwan said it was because they didn’t ‘show off enough’. ( _ “I mean, where’s the PDA, the rings, the crazy confessions in the middle of campus?” _ , he said - Jihoon pretty much wanted to murder the kid).

 

“I know it’s not your thing, but-” Seokmin stares at the ceiling “I just… It feels like you don’t like me the way I like you, okay?”

 

Jihoon grimaces at his boyfriend. He’s almost offended. How could Seokmin think something like that of him?

 

“What the hell are you talking about? If I didn’t liked you, I wouldn’t be dating you. We’ve been together for almost two months now!” Jihoon turns back to his computer, still frowning at what the younger said.

 

“You never said it.”

 

“Said what?”

 

“That you liked me back.”

 

The older freezes. His expression softens and he looks back at Seokmin, who is staring at him with eyes welled in tears. Jihoon is not sure about what to do. He has never been this type of person, who can easily run to the others and hug them and say reassuring words. In a way, he was attracted by Seokmin because he felt like the younger would never crumble - Seokmin was literally the sun, a pretty light that never went dark. He thought that, with Seokmin, he would never have to deal with this type of things. But Seokmin is crying. And Jihoon is lost.

 

“Seokmin…” 

 

The younger stares at him, looking so, so sad. Seokmin’s about to full on crying now. That’s when Jihoon has an idea. It’s a silly one, and he feels embarrassed about it, but he has no others.

 

“Seokmin, come over here.”

 

The performing arts major shakes his head “Are you breaking up with me?”

 

Jihoon sighs. He gets up and softly takes Seokmin by the wrist, dragging him to the swivel chair. Jihoon sits first and carefully guides Seokmin to sit on his lap, wrapping his arms around the younger’s waist in what he hopes it is a comforting manner. Seokmin looks so confused and tiny like a little kid, even though he is much bigger than Jihoon. The older smiles softly as he takes the headphones and places them in Seokmin’s ears.

 

After clicking a few times on the mouse to find what he was looking for, Jihoon opens a folder called “no one should see this”. And then a song titled “adore u”. And then he looks at Seokmin’s face while the song played.

 

He watches as Seokmin’s hurt expression turns into a sweet and slightly amused one.

 

“That’s not you rapping, right?” Seokmin smiles at the older below him.

 

“Don’t be so cocky, you brat!” Jihoon pinches the side of Seokmin’s waist. “But yeah, Chan and Hansol did it.”

 

When the song is over, Seokmin carefully takes off the headphones, settling them on his neck. He looks cute like that, Jihoon thinks. The younger sighs before he begins speaking.

 

“That was…”

 

“For you.” Jihoon completes, startling the other “I may not be able to express my feelings the usual way but- I do stuff like that… Once in a while. I do like you. Holy shit, of course I like you. I adore you. Okay?”

 

Seokmin smiles. “Okay. I adore you too.” He kisses Jihoon forehead. “Thanks for showing me this.”

 

“Yeah, and I also was wondering if…” Jihoon begins, and Seokmin raises his eyebrows “Maybe you could sing the chorus, and the beginning, and the ‘you are my angel’ part~” Jihoon uses the tiniest hint of aegyo (just because he  _ knows _ Seokmin loves it). 

 

Seokmin laughs loudly, and that it’s quite nice.

 

* * *

 

They’ve been dating for almost four months now, and they’ve been fine; going on dates, celebrating anniversaries, being happy most of the time. Showing off was still an issue but they always talked over it and solved it. Sometimes it was boring, but Jihoon guessed it was common between established relationships.  So everything was just okay, even when Seokmin announced he had to travel overseas for a few months.

 

“I got offered an internship to learn musical acting in Japan. They do some really cool musicals there, did you knew that?” Seokmin looked excited, laying down next to Jihoon in the older’s bed. Jihoon smiles. He is happy for his boyfriend.

 

“That’s great.” he said, caressing Seokmin’s nape, in the rare moments Jihoon initiated skinship. “You’re gonna nail it.”

 

Seokmin smiles widens a bit. He hasn't been smiling much lately, which is weird. Jihoon tried not to pay much attention to it, because it was almost nothing of a change, but he did. But  _ it was _ hell week in college for Seokmin after all, and Jihoon had a tendency to overthink. He was also really bad when it came to talking about feelings, so he’d rather wait for Seokmin to bring something up. Jihoon pops out of his trance when Seokmin makes a fake teasing whining noise.

 

“But that means I’m going to be away from you, Jihoonie~” the younger says, pouting exaggeratedly. Jihoon laughs.

 

“That won't be a problem.” he assures, playing with Seokmin hair.

 

The perfoming arts student pouts again, but this time is for real. “Well, doesn't concern you? A long distance relationship?” Jihoon kisses the pout away.

 

“I’m not worried.” Jihoon says truthfully.

 

Seokmin raises an eyebrow at his boyfriend, to which Jihoon frowns playfully.

 

“Hey, and you didn't looked all that nervous too. You were so excited just now, what happened?”

 

“It’s just, it’s gonna be so different. I like being around you!”

 

“And I, you” Jihoon answers, smiling. They did established a routine and they liked following it. They got used to eating lunch together, walking each other to their classes and playing video game or cuddling and watching Netflix together. It was fun, and reassuring. It’d be weird if they got apart, but that's not  _ that _ serious.... “Yah, you don't think I’d cheat on you, do you?”

 

“No.” Seokmin says, and Jihoon misses the slight tremble in his voice.

 

“Then we’ll be fine.”

 

There's a pause while they simply hug on the mattress, observing each other’s faces.

 

“But won't you miss me?” Seokmin suddenly says.

 

“Will you?” 

 

There’s no answer.

 

“We’ll be fine. Okay?”

 

Jihoon honestly felt that. It was weird. Wasn’t he supposed to be sad? Wasn’t he supposed to not want his boyfriend to go so far away for  _ months _ ? Wasn't he supposed to  _ need _ him around? Jihoon simply brushes the thoughts away and concentrates in the moles scattered around Seokmin’s face, kissing every single one of them, eliciting giggles from the younger. It probably meant nothing. It probably just meant everything was really, really fine.

 

* * *

 

“Jihoon, that’s a disaster” Chanhyuk says, putting his hot chocolate down. That meant the situation was really serious.

 

“Do you think so?” Seungcheol asks, frowning “I think it’s sweet. I mean, if you don’t worry about the person you love being away it means you trust them, right?”

 

“It could also mean you don’t care enough” Jisoo points out, raising an eyebrow at his husband. Chan gives Jihoon a sympathetic look, Jeonghan simply shruggs and Yejin, as usual, doesn’t seem to even know where she is.

 

They are all gathered around a round table in JamJam, doing what they unofficially called “Jihoon’s love life intervention”. The group consisted of Jihoon’s childhood best friends, Seungcheol and Yejin; high school bestfriends, Jisoo and Jeonghan; and college bestfriends, Chan and Lee Chanhyuk, who he met at composition classes and became friends with after they were paired up for a project and ended up talking about music and the struggles of short heighted people. 

 

Jihoon himself, of course, was also there, listening as his friends discussed over the “my boyfriend is going to be away for months but I don’t feel anything about it” subject. It all innocently started with Yejin’s visit, which gathered Seungcheol, Jisoo, Jeonghan and Jihoon. But the pink haired boy was already meeting Chanhyuk that day, so he brought him along. Finally, Chan asked where Jihoon was going when he was leaving the apartment, and then decided to just tag along as well. Thus, the seven of them meeting at JamJam, Jeonghan pinching Chan’s cheeks and the discussion on Jihoon’s love life.

 

“ _ Ay, let me get this straight _ .” Yejin says in english, making Jeonghan and Seungcheol, the worse english speakers, frown at her. “You like the guy and you’ve been dating for months, but now he’s going away for Japan and you don’t feel any sad?”

 

Jihoon nods “He’s coming back in a few months, but yeah, that’s it.”

 

“That’s, well…” Amy sighs “I’m not gonna lie, it's actually a bit concerning.”

 

“But hyung, you and Seokmin are doing really well.” Chan points out “I mean, you don't look troubled at all, just a happy couple.”

 

“What makes you think that there is something wrong?” Jeonghan questions.

 

“That’s the thing, I-” Jihoon says, eyes wandering and then frowning “I really like Seokmin, but-” Jihoon hesitates. But what?

 

“But you can't exactly pinpoint it, but something doesn't feel quite right” Seungcheol completes, making a significant expression.

 

Jihoon nods before burying his face in his hands. “Am I a horrible boyfriend? A horrible person?”

 

“Jihoonie, stop.” Amy says, caressing her best friend’s back. “It isn't your fault. Or his. Maybe, I don't know, you're just better off as friends.”

 

“Honestly Jihoon” Chanhyuk finally says something asides from ‘disaster’. Jihoon was actually looking foward for this advice, since Chanhyuk was a thoroughly wise person - at least judging by the music lyrics he wrote. “Loving him in a ‘I wanna marry him’ manner or not, you do care about him, right?” Jihoon makes an agreement noise “Then don't drag this on and risk hurting him. Tell him the truth.”

 

“Do you think I should break up?” Jihoon looks at his friends, alarmed “What if he hates me? One day he thought I was going to break up with him and he cried. I can’t do that to him.”

 

“He won't.” An eight voice is heard. Jihoon frowns - eavesdropping was something he did not tolerated. He turned around to meet with a curious looking Seungkwan, carrying a tray full of dishes. 

 

“Kwannie hyung” Chan says, looking surprised. “I thought you didn’t worked on sundays?

 

Seungkwan makes a disappointed noise “I thought that too, but Minghao didn’t show up so boss made come and cover” He sighs and turns to Jihoon “Hyung, can I talk to you? I think I can help.”

 

Jihoon is still a bit dazed, so he just nods and follow the younger to a backroom, where Seungkwan leaves the tray in a sink and sighs again before he starts talking.

 

“Hyung, Seokmin has a few self-esteem issues.” Seungkwan fiddles with his fingers “How can I say this…? He’s always afraid people won't like him the way he does. He had some really asshole of friends in high school who didn't cared much about him when he was always there for them.” 

 

“He never-”

 

“I guess he never told you that because I don't know, he probably thinks it’ll scare you off. I only know this because I found him having an anxiety crisis one day in school’s bathroom and he told me after I helped him out.”

 

Jihoon feels, at least, shitty. How could he not know about something this important about his boyfriend?

 

“But the thing is, Seokmin likes you, but from what he’s been telling me, he’s also unsure about this relationship. Also…” Seungkwan bites his lip, as if considering his words “I think he’s liking  someone else, and it's making him sad these days, because he feels guilty. He didn’t told me any of this, but we have a few classes together and you don’t have to be a genius to notice how he looks at Choi Yuna. And she is going with him to study in Japan.”

 

The shorter boy widens his eyes. _ “Yah, you don't think I’d cheat on you, do you?” _ , Jihoon asked, but that’s not what Seokmin was worried about - it was the other way round. Oh my god, oh my god...

 

“It’s up to you, really, but as Seokmin’s and your friend, please, do break up with him. It’ll be best for both of you.”

 

* * *

 

_ Hey, can we talk? _

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ hoonie i need to talk to you _

_ oh _

_ nice timing~ _

 

_ Can u come over? _

 

**_Tall Stupid and Handsome_ **

_ on my way baby _

 

Jihoon’s heart tugs just as slightly at the treatment. Baby. He liked when Seokmin called him that. Such a sweet word that only the sunshiney boy seemed to be able to associate it to short and violent Jihoon. He wouldn’t be hearing it anymore, and that is a tiny bit sad.

 

In fifteen minutes there is a knock on the door, to which Jihoon runs to open. He’d sent Chan away for a while and rehearsed what he was supposed to say, but it felt so weird nonetheless.

 

“Hey~” he opens the door as naturally as possible, since that place was pretty familiar to Seokmin, and it wouldn’t become formal and polite all of the sudden.

 

“Hi” Seokmin says shyly, which is rare.

 

They stare at each other for a while. It’s not uncomfortable, but in a way they both know what they’re there for. Jihoon sees Seokmin biting his lips and opens his mouth to scold him, but another sentence comes out, just as Seokmin says something as well.

 

“I think we should break up.” 

 

“Let’s break up.”

 

Huh. That was easy.

 

“I like you.” Jihoon smiles after sighing deeply. Screw the speech. He didn’t need that kind of stuff when it came to Seokmin.

 

Seokmin laughs, scratching his nape “Yeah, I like you too.”

 

“But you love Choi Yuna.” Jihoon cocks his head, curious.

 

Seokmin chokes, coughing and hitting his chest to calm down. Jihoon, as the very supportive (ex?) boyfriend he is, starts laughing out loud.

 

“How did y-”

 

“I understand, you know?” Jihoon brings a hand up to carress the taller’s hair “What we have… It’s really precious, but it’s not like... Romantic love, is it?”

 

Seokmin takes Jihoon’s other hand. Not much words were needed. The younger nods and hugs Jihoon tightly (after they break apart, it feels like it’s officially over. Not sadly, and not dramatically, but done. And okay.)

 

“I hope you get her” Jihoon says blinking as, a few minutes later, he brings a soda to his ex-boyfriend and current bestfriend.

 

“Oh my god” Seokmin burries his face in his hands.

 

“Too early?”

 

“Definitely, baby.” the younger says with a smug smile.

 

Well, maybe Jihoon wasn’t going to never hear that word again. After all, he just did. But with a different meaning, and a much more right one.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it! Don`t forget to leave a comment ♥


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